Backpacker Jackie

Ready for a change

Tue, 02 Jun 2009 07:13:10 GMT

I think I am having a mid-life crisis or something like it. Turning 30 this year has affected me more than I thought it would. Now that we have a baby, my whole perspective has changed. The bottom line is I am not happy. Being off of work for so long has given me a lot of time to think about what I want out of life. The path I am on right now isn't making me happy.

Number one I want Brandon and I to raise our daughter. I hate that we have to leave her to work especially when she is so small. We're going to work on changing that. I will try to telework more. Maybe one of us could go part-time or even quit.   We're monitoring where all of our money is going to see where we can trim.

Speaking of money, we are going to focus on spending money to make memories not more stuff. This is more my problem than Brandon's. We have tons of stuff under the house that should all just go. I don't really need all the jewelry I buy or the clothes or the shoes or the DVDs or the baby stuff. I am a notorious online depression shopper. That needs to stop. I think when I was really sick over Christmas the UPS and FedEx guy were at our house every day. So far I have been doing pretty well. The only stuff I have bought are things we actually need. Both of us want to get rid of a bunch of stuff. A lot of it is ebay worthy which takes a lot of time. It is going to be a slow process.

The plan for the summer is to hike as much as we can or go out and do other fun stuff.  I want Rory to be active and hopefully love the outdoors as much as we do.  I am hoping we get Hawks season tickets. That will actually save us money.

Work is awful right now. I definitely don't want to go back and have to deal with the current climate there. It is nothing but layoffs. The cuts are deeper than I ever thought was possible. That has me thinking about what I really want to do with my career. Should I stay with WY if they don't lay me off? Should I go back to school and get an MBA? Should I get out of IT altogether and open my doggy wash/daycare/bakery/photo salon?   Maybe getting laid-off wouldn't be such a bad thing. It isn't a very fun place to work right now. I am glad I have been gone the last few months.

Brandon and I are talking about whether we want to stay in the Seattle area. Both of fell in love with Utah and Alaska. Maybe we should move. Obviously that wouldn't happen until we could sell our house for at least what we paid.

Brandon is totally on board. It has been really nice the last few weeks to plan our weekend and go do fun stuff. It feels like we are actually working for something not just for a giant container for all our crap. It is fun taking Aurora to all of these places.

Guess I have been a little busy...

Fri, 10 Apr 2009 17:48:50 GMT

It has been a long time since I posted!!! Wow.

Aurora and I are home from the hospital now. She was released from the NICU about 6 hours before I was being discharged. That was a relief. I didn't want leave without her.

I was so glad to get out of the hospital. They don't leave you alone long enough to get any sleep at all. They are constantly checking temperature and blood pressure. Every morning for rounds, the Dr comes in to check you out. It doesn't matter if you are sleeping. I was also glad to leave just from the stress of the place. I definitely don't have good memories.

Of course being me, as soon as we got on the road to go home I started having a full-on panic attack. It was like, holy crap now we have to take care of this little thing! Wow. I was shaking and crying. It was awful. I think with my high-anxiety personality combined with the hormones, the stress of the week, and exhaustion I was bound to have an attack. It was bad. I needed a lot of moral support. My Dad and Sandi came over and stayed for several hours. We got pizza. They stayed with me while Brandon went to the store and to fill my prescriptions.

The first several days were rough. I wasn't producing enough breastmilk so I was having to pump constantly. That is a lot of work for someone without a baby to take care of too. On Saturday we went to see the lactation consultant at Valley. She helped me get Rory to latch properly. It is going better, but we are still having to supplement. After 2.5 weeks, I still don't have enough for her. I don't know how much longer I will be able to breastfeed. The Dr is concerned about her because she hasn't gained any weight in 2 weeks which is bad. She should be gaining an ounce a day. She doesn't seem like she isn't getting enough, but since she isn't gaining weight, the Dr is concerned.

Brandon has been just awesome. He has jumped in head first. It is great. He doesn't flinch at poopy diapers or a screaming baby. He even takes the night shift so I can get some sleep. In addition to that he makes dinner and does anything else that needs to be done. He is the best husband a girl could ask for.

The worst moment of my life

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 21:37:57 GMT

At 7:30 tonight, the Dr decided it was time for a c-section. I was actually relieved. I couldn't take much more laying there and waiting. It was a little scary though. We went from sitting there for hours and hours to immediate action. The nurses brought Brandon what looked like a painter's uniform. They were doing all kinds of things to me. There were 4 of them around me doing stuff. I started having a panic attack. My blood pressure which had been a stable 105/78 spiked up to 197/100-something. Of course I started crying again. I barely had time to comprehend what was happening before we were going down the hall toward the surgical bay. I was shaking and crying. It was really scary. I was worried about the baby and me. They moved so fast I wasn't sure what was wrong.

Once in the operating room, they numbed me up even more. My blood pressure was sky high. Brandon couldn't come in right away either. He had to wait outside while they put me on the table and prepped my stomach.   The gas man was really nice. He was re-assuring and said everything would be fine. They put up a screen across my chest so I couldn't see what they were doing. Brandon came in too and sat by my head.

Then they started cutting. It felt like somone dragging their finger across my stomach. It didn't hurt at all. It is a really weird sensation. They have to cut through several layers - skin, muscle, uterus so it felt like they were cutting and cutting and cutting. I imagined I had a 20in scar. The worst part was the pressure. They try to simulate a normal birth by pressing the baby out. That hurts a lot! A whole lot. Brandon actually got pictures of the baby coming out. They are gory and only for us, but they are pretty cool. The Drs let Brandon announce that it is a girl. I started to cry again. I could hear her screaming. It was fabulous. A few minutes later, Brandon brought her over for me see.

That's when the trouble started. Brandon only showed her to me briefly, and I didn't know why. I was shaking and having a lot trouble too. The Drs actually put me out which is not normally done in a c-section. I was shaking so much they were having trouble sewing me up.

Normally the baby goes back to the room with me. Since I was knocked out, I don't remember coming back to my room. When I woke-up I was wrapped in hot blankets and on an oxygen mask. I was in a ton of pain. I remember my parents being there. The baby and Brandon were not there. That was the worst for me. I started to panic again. I will never forget realizing they weren't there. That was horrible. Probably one of the worst moments of my life. Brandon felt bad too. He wanted to be in both places at once. I am glad he stayed with Aurora. I didn't want her to be alone.

Finally after what seemed like a really long time (I have no idea how long it really was though) Brandon came in. He had a horrible look on his face. He wanted everyone out of the room so he could talk to me. That scared me even more. Finally he told me our daughter was having breathing problems due to some small holes in her lungs (pneumothorax). He looked really upset. I was really upset. Brandon said the Drs said her condition wasn't critical, but it was serious enough to warrant time in the NICU.

The worst for me was that I couldn't go see her. I was told I couldn't get out of bed for at least 12 hours. Plus I still had a catheter in. Obviously I had just had major abdominal surgery too. Even on a very high dose of morphine, I didn't sleep at all. Brandon and I were waiting on word from the NICU. They were going to do some repeat x-rays to check on the holes (they should close fast).

Finally at 6am, I couldn't take it anymore. When the nurse came in to check on me, I told her I had to get up. I wasn't going to lay there another 4 hours. The Dr came in to check on me to make sure it was okay. They had to remove the catheter too. The most fun was getting up. That hurt so bad. It felt like I was ripping my stomach apart. Before I could go to the NICU, they wanted me to pee.   You have to do it under the supervision of the nurse. I honestly didn't care. She had to help me down and up. It hurt a lot!!!

Finally I was wheeled over the NICU. When I saw Aurora, she was hooked up to several monitors, an IV, and oxygen. That was hard to see. She was alert and responsive. I got to hold her finally which made me feel a lot better about her condition. The Drs and the nurses said she was doing great. After a few x-rays and continuous monitoring, Aurora's condition improved rapidly. They are keeping her in the NICU because she is spitting up a lot when being fed which is worrisome.

I think it is going to take a really long time for me to recover from the emotional stress of the last couple days. It was definitely not the delivery and first moments with my daughter that I had imagined. I can barely type this without crying.

36 hours an counting

Wed, 01 Apr 2009 19:53:52 GMT

Being induced has been the absolute worst. It is painful and frustrating. I am constantly being checked on so there is time to sleep. They have been giving me an internal drug to help effacement. It isn't working very fast at all. I went from 10% effaced to 80% in 36 hours! Suck. Administering the medication is less than fun. It is so painful I actually cry everytime they give it to me. Brandon said he has never seen me in so much pain. Once they give me the medicine, I have to stay in bed on a monitor which consists of bands around my stomach monitoring contractions and the baby's heartbeat. I have to have my blood pressure taken every 15 minutes too. My arm is actually bruised from all the squeezing. All of this was from the middle of the night.

At 9:30 this morning, they decided I was effaced enough to start pitocin which really gets contractions going. It should also make me dilate. I was still only 4cm. The baby is still at a +3 which means 3cm above my pelvic bone. It should be at a -1 when ready for birth. At 11:30 I was in a lot of pain. A whole lot of pain. To speed up labor they wanted to break my water too. I finally got the epidural. That was a super fun experience too. While having painful contractions I had to sit up on the edge of the bed with my back exposed (not that this is a problem since everyone and their mother in the Birth Center has seen every part of me by now). Without moving at all, the Dr inserts a tube in my spine. They numb the area, but it still hurts like a bitch. Of course you have to hold perfectly still. During one contraction that damn blood pressure thing went off too. Brandon was right there with me. He was holding me still.

I have to say the epidural was nice once it took effect. It sucked though because I couldn't get out of bed. I had to have a catheter for obvious reasons. Once the epidural was in, I didn't feel the contractions or being 'checked.'

So after 36 hours, my labor totally stalled out. The baby's heart rate started dropping after each contraction which is an indicator it is in distress. It is c-section time.

I take it all back...

Tue, 24 Mar 2009 00:35:41 GMT

I am thinking I could take another week of being pregnant. Being in the Birth Center all day has been really scary. I had a full on panic attack on the way to hospital this morning. I was scared to death. Poor Brandon. He is probably the only person in the world that could calm me down and make me feel like everything was going to be okay.

He dropped me off at the main entrance and then went to park the car. I walked into the Birth Center and within 3 minutes I was in my room in a hospital gown and everything. They run a tight ship. My nurse, Betty, is great. She is really friendly and explains everything they are doing to me. I am mainly just laying here waiting for the medication to work. I took a little nap. We watched a movie and have been surfing the web all day. Thank goodness they have free wifi. That is nice.

I am absolutely exhausted. I didn't sleep a wink last night. I was in a ton of pain plus I was freaking out. It wasn't pretty. I actually got up at 3:30 and did a full backup of my laptop.

I can't wait for this to all be over. I hate not knowing what is going to happen. There are so many things that could go wrong. Actually being in the hospital and seeing other patients, it is in your face what can go wrong. I am in a world of pain too. The medication they gave me is making me hurt a lot more too. I don't want any pain meds until I absolutely can't stand it anymore. Once I ask for them, I can't eat anything until the baby is out. That could be another 12-18 hours. I don't want to risk a blood sugar crash.

It has been nice just having Brandon there all day. I wouldn't mind seeing the family, but I don't really feel social. Not to mention my hospital gown at this point is basically a 'snuggy.' I don't want a bunch of people to see me in pain like that.

I'm ready I'm ready I'm ready

Sun, 22 Mar 2009 18:01:42 GMT

Today we are going through our long to-do list of last minute pre-baby tasks. We did a lot of it last night too. I did one load of laundry last night so I only have 2 to do today. Brandon ran the dishwasher so that's done. I trimmed Dottie's nails and put her flea stuff on. I felt really bad because I trimmed one nail too short and she bled :( She didn't seem too upset by it, but I felt awful. Poor puppy. She really stinks too so Brandon may give her a bath today. He's going to vaccuum again. The rest of the house is pretty darn clean. We need to go to the grocery store and costco too.

Yesterday we both stopped by our offices to do some last-minute prep. I wanted to pick-up a few things. Plus I needed to set my out of office vm message and forward my phone to vm. I filled up my water bottles so someone will be able to water my plants easily. Brandon wanted to put his work on CD so if he needed to work from home at all next week he could.

Then we went to the new Japanese Steakhouse for dinner for Barry's 60th birthday. The place was pretty cool. I didn't eat anything of course, but it is fun to watch them cook the food. My favorite is of course the onion volcano. I also think how they break the egg on the edge of one of their cooking tools is really cool. The place was really expensive! Brandon got the salmon which was $18.00. Add my soda and Barry's birthday dessert and we were paying $30.00! I didn't even eat anything. After dinner I really wanted one of the new cold stone cupcakes, but they were all out :( Suck.

I am really hoping the birth center can get us in tomorrow. I am so tired of being in so much pain. It is absolutely exhausting.

A birthday, a wedding, and finally a baby

Sat, 21 Mar 2009 04:40:55 GMT

Heard from the dr finally. They tried to get us in to induce today, but the birth center was slammed :( We are now on the books for Monday. Since we are not emergent, we could still get bumped. I am hoping not. I don't know how I am going to survive the weekend. I am in so much pain right now.

Tomorrow night we are going to the new Japanese Steakhouse in Covington for Brandon's dad's 60th birthday. I won't eat anything, but it is always fun to see the onion volcano. Maybe they do one with fire! Sunday we are going to Brandon's friend's wedding in Issaquah. It starts at 7 so we may hit the Melting Pot for happy hour! Mmmmmm. We'll see. Tonight I found something decent to wear. At least it isn't jeans.

I am so tired. I worked all day in bed. Even after that I am toast. We had to go to Renton tonight to pick-up Barry's present. We went to Vince's for dinner which was really good. We also hit Target for some things Brandon needed. After that much excitement, I fell asleep in the car just outside of Renton and slept all the way home.

I have been really cranky today. I was trying to lay low at work today. I didn't think I was in the proper state of mind to respond to some of the emails I received. Instead I focussed on getting my time entry done, cleaning out my inbox, submitting my carpool calendar, etc.

I think it is time for bed now.

I can haz baby now?

Thu, 19 Mar 2009 18:13:08 GMT

Sigh.yesterday was not fun at all. I had an early morning dr appt. I was
hoping he would tell me we are really close. No cigar. He checked me and
said we were a ways off. On top of that, for the first time ever my blood
pressure was high. It registered 139/89. High blood pressure is usually
140/90 or higher. My blood pressure is usually somewhere around 105/65.
The Dr was very concerned about that. He had me go in for a non-stress test
which means I lay down with a sensor on my stomach monitoring the baby's
heartbeat and movement. That came out normal. The Dr wanted some blood
work done too to see if there was an explanation for the high blood
pressure. I had to go to the lab for that. On top of everything else, I
also had to go in for another renal ultrasound. My poor right kidney isn't
doing well. Based on all of those tests, the Dr may decide to induce sooner
rather than later. We are waiting to hear from him today. I hope he calls
soon.

After having all of that done yesterday, I was sooo sore last night. I
could not get comfortable at all.

End of an era

Tue, 17 Mar 2009 07:02:19 GMT

Tomorrow will be the last edition of the Seattle P-I. It is very sad the paper is closing. I feel bad for the employees.

I am annoyed however with all the coverage of the closings like the paper was just a victim to the economy and the internet. The media makes it sound like the newspapers have been ganged up on by the evil likes of craigslist and the rest of the internet. It isn't craigslist's fault the newspapers couldn't figure out how to compete. The newspapers themselves are to blame for not figuring out sooner the internet was going to replace print media. They are yet to figure out how to be profitable with an online-only product. For years the Times, P-I, and the old King County Journal have been losing buckets of money from losses in subscribers, ad sales, and classifieds. None of them tried to really do anything about it. The companies responded by cutting staff and putting out a smaller paper with less and less coverage of the local news. I realize financially maybe that is what they thought they had to do, but did they honestly think that would bring back readers and advertisers?

I remember reading the Valley when I was in high school. I only read it because it covered my school. I could read about my friends and myself once or twice. My doubles match tennis score wasn't going to be in the Times. I liked the local stories. It wasn't all about Seattle or Tacoma. I remember the KCJ lost a lot of subscribers when they cut the local high school sports coverage. They only covered the major high school sports and forgot all about girl's tennis. As the paper lost more and more money, coverage of the major sports were deeply cut too. Once that happened, the section covered a very small percentage of the local community. Why would people pay for that?

In addition to reduced coverage, the evil internet sprouted up too. All of the newspapers in Seattle have websites where they publish all news stories for us to read for free. Sure there are items from the print version they don't publish, but anything of note is online immediately. A lot of times the stories are there before the newspaper has even been printed. I won't pay for the paper if I can read it online for free. I especially like that I can read it from my blackberry on the mobile version of the site. I read the Times, the NY Times, and whatever is on google news everyday. I think that is definitely how people are going to get their news going forward. I hope the websites continue.

I don't know anyone near my age that still gets the newspaper. Everyone I know reads the news online. It makes me angry when I hear the newspapers blaming the internet for their problems. The problem is the newspapers haven't changed with their readers. My dad is in his 60s and reads the paper online. He even comments on stories! Sure there are still people that like to read the paper over their morning coffee, but their numbers are dwindling. I like to read the paper with my coffee too. I just read it on the computer screen. Why hasn't the newspaper industry figured out how to make it work? They have had years and years and years to adjust and try different things. All I ever hear is they can't compete with the likes of craigslist. Of course they can't compete with craigslist. They want to apply the same business model to the internet that they apply to print. It doesn't work.

If I want a used couch, I know I can go to craigslist and find hundreds of listings near my house. It is easy. If I want to sell something, it is free and accepts pictures! Why would I pay $25 for an ad in the newspaper when criagslist reaches so many more people and is free?

Anyway, I do feel bad Seattle is losing the PI. I hope they can grow their online-only product. Maybe they can be the poster child for how to reinvent the business of reporting the local news online. Maybe they should hire my husband and his former KCJ friends. I know they had a lot of good ideas that I think people would respond to.

Spa Update

Mon, 16 Mar 2009 01:23:10 GMT

As I mentioned my two $400 massages were reduced to $160 each. I am still pissed about that. Yesterday in the mail I received a card from the spa apologizing for the cluster. They also included a gift card for one free $80 maternity massage :) So with the gift card, I will have had 3 massages for $320 which is almost reasonable. We'll see.

I guess I better go this week though otherwise I won't qualify for the maternity massage :)

Are we there yet?

Mon, 16 Mar 2009 01:00:39 GMT

Last night's party at RJs was the best! I had so much fun. I miss being around all of those people all the time. Dottie got to go too. C brought Roxy too so there were 4 total dogs. Dottie did okay. She was a bit of a turd when we first got there. I think all the dogs overwhelmed her a bit. She calmed down and did fine. She stuck to me like glue though. Everywhere I went, Dottie was right on my heels. Several times she had a fit to be held. I don't think she knew what to do with all the people either. She got lots of attention and treats.

It was great to see Sherm and C. I miss them. JJ and JJ came too. JJ brought us a cute baby book and the book 'Guess how much I love you.' That was really sweet of her. She had a great new Coach bag. I really like it. The wallet is nice too. I may have to hit the outlet store soon and see if anything new is in and on sale.

We played several rounds of Catch Phrase. I love that game. It is so funny. People say some of the funniest things. I think my favorite was C saying 'Tunist.' I enjoyed just talking and catching-up with everyone. Brandon's bruchetta seemed to be a hit too. JJ told me something super funny lilturtle needs to hear too. I nearly peed my pants.

Dottie slept all the way home and sacked out until 10:30 this morning. She has been sluggish all day today too :) I didn't sleep well at all. My lower back has been killing me. I really hope this kid comes soon. Today we washed all our bedding and did al the laundry. I took the time to hook-up our all-in-one printer on the network. Since Brandon's desktop is on the fritz, I thought it was time. It wasn't too big of a pain in the butt. It took a while to find the printer's MAC address, but once I did setup was a snap.

We'll see if I can manage to get myself into work tomorrow. I may work from home. If I am in this much pain tomorrow, there is no way I will be able to go in.

Crash!

Sun, 15 Mar 2009 00:02:05 GMT

I have been working like crazy this week. I am at work all day and then working at least a few hours every night. I want to make sure everything is done or in an easily transitioned state when I finally deliver this baby. It has been really tiring. Thursday night I totally crashed and slept for almost 6 hours straight which is a long time for me now. Wednesday night I hurt all over for some reason. My joints, muscles, everything. I didn't sleep well that night so I probably needed to catch up on Thursday night.

Friday I worked from home which made my day. That is so much easier on me. I get so much done at home too. Half my group doesn't work on Fridays. Most people work from home that day too so there aren't many meetings. I was cranking through a bunch of stuff. At 5 I needed to do an install in our prod environment. That took longer than expected. It should have taken 30 minutes but wasn't done for an hour. Once I finished, PH started testing out his code. There were several security issues we needed to work on. I ended up working until a little after 7:30.

Right in the middle of troubleshooting, I totally had a blood sugar crash. It came on really really fast. One minute I was working away. The next I was covered in sweat, dizzy, and shaking. I didn't think I could make it downstairs for something to eat. Brandon had taken Dottie for a long walk. I was about to call him when he came back. He brought me a banana, crackers, cheese and juice. I ate as fast as I could, but it took a really long time to feel better. I had only had cereal and a little snack that whole day. As this kid demands more and more, I guess I better watch it. It was a little scary. I thought I might actually pass out.

Once that was over and I was done troubleshooting, we decided to run our weekend errands to get them out of the way. We had a return for Babies R Us. I needed some stuff at Target. We thought would do all of that and then eat at the XXX. The errands were pretty quick. We got to the XXX at 9:15. They were closed!!!! I couldn't believe it. It was a friday night. Their sign says they close 'whenever.' I guess that means pretty damn early. Sigh. I really wanted some curly fries. I wasn't feeling too good anyway so we just made dinner at home.

We were up late making the bruchetta for RJs party tonight. I am looking forward to that. I miss everyone from my old team. She wants us to bring Dottie too. That should be interesting! I hope Dottie isn't too much of a turd to Buddy.

Covington MultiCare Spa - total cluster!!!

Thu, 12 Mar 2009 05:25:06 GMT

The massage saga continued today. Yesterday MutiCare left me a message at home saying the billing issue was resolved and to give them a call. I called this morning and talked to the rudest lady EVER! She was nasty to me just trying to pull my account up. She told me my complaint had come back from coding and $396 was the proper charge for the massage. I told her I was told on Friday the charge had been reduced to $160. She said no that if I still had a problem with the charge I needed to call the spa manager. Well now she just pissed me off. She was being rude for no reason. I politely told her no, that is was not my job to call the spa manager. Obviously there is an internal problem at MultiCare that is not up to me to fix. Lucky for me, the nice lady that had been working my case overheard this woman. She chimed in and told her to tell me she was working on it and would call me this afternoon with any news.

So the nice lady calls me at 4:30. I guess after talking with everyone and their mother at MultiCare, the proper charge for my 'medical massage' is $160. That is better than the $400. I am definitely not happy though. I guess what happened is that I received this medical massage because I came into the spa with a prescription for massage from my doctor for back pain. Even though I asked for the maternity massage ($80) because I had the doctor note I got the special medical massage. Honestly it didn't feel any different than any other massage. The lady wasn't that good at all. Now this all makes perfectly logical sense with one exception - NO ONE TOLD ME!!! I had no idea the massage was different. I didn't know I was getting the special massage. No one at MultiCare said a dang thing to me. That is a HUGE problem. Sure my insurance will cover just about all of it, but I don't want them getting screwed either. I thanked the lady for following up with me and for getting the charge straightened out. I did tell her I am not happy with their process though. I will definitely be calling the spa manager to discuss my dissatisfaction. I doubt he or she will do anything, but I will feel better. I may see who else at MultiCare I can complain to as well. I have no problem relaying my story over and over and over again.

What sucks about all of this is I am hurting like crazy and could really use a stupid massage. I am thinking on Saturday I will go to Massage Envy and get a nice 90 minute MATERNITY massage. At least I can turn that into our FSA. I don't want to use my Gene Juarez gift cards until after I deliver. I want to be able to lay on my stomach so they can really work out all the knots!

Thought we should use it once!

Mon, 09 Mar 2009 21:12:28 GMT

11 years today...

Mon, 09 Mar 2009 05:51:03 GMT

Brandon and I have been together for 11 years today. It doesn't seem like it has been that long. We didn't get each other anything or have any elaborate plans. We spent a lot on Valentine's Day so we were both good. The only thing we wanted to do was go out to the Melting Pot for dinner. It will probably be the last night out just the two of us for a long time. It was good too. We had two fiesta cheeses which sounds like a lot, but it really wasn't. They changed their portions so the old fiesta cheese is about halved for just two people :( Anyway it was really good. I thought we weren't going to be able to go because of all the snow. It was coming down in buckets this afternoon. We had three inches on the road within 2 hours! It was weird too because the traffic cameras were showing sunny and clear in both Bellevue and Tacoma. We must have just been stuck in a squal. It melted fast.

We ran a bunch errands after dinner too. It wasn't the most romantic of days, but we were fine with it. I don't need a bunch of flowers, cards, or candy.

Tonight we have been rushing around trying to get all of our chores done. Stupid spring forward! I know I am going to be off all week from it too. Suck!

Busy Week

Sun, 08 Mar 2009 05:39:23 GMT

This week was exhausting! Work has been so busy and has been made worse by the fact I have a bunch of things I have to finish before I go out on leave. I hate to leave things undone. Everyone else is too busy to pick up my slack anyway. Several nights were spent doing thank you notes and other baby prep related things. The rest were spent online working. I think I put in at least 12 hours OT this week. That is a lot at this point in the pregnancy. I would pretty much collapse in bed every night.

Last night we ran errands so we didn't have to go anywhere today. It was tiring, but I really wanted a whole day at home. We went to be at 10. I slept all the way through the night pretty much. I got up once at 6am and then slept until 10. It was really really nice. I totally needed it.

Rather than lounge about today which I don't think I am capable of, I did a bunch of organizing. I cleared space in our cabinets for baby bottles and accessories. I also organized the dresser drawers in the baby's room. Up to this point they were being used to store baby stuff and weren't organized for someone to actually use the items conveniently. I also finished putting away all the baby shower gifts. I put all the bath time stuff in the bathroom so it was ready to go. We washed and sterilized all the bottles and pacifiers. I finished packing the diaper bag for the trip to the hospital. Both carseats are installed and ready to go too. I pretty much wore myself out, but it felt good to get all of that done. Brandon also cleaned the whole downstairs too so we have a clean house to bring the baby home to.

Tomorrow we are going to the Melting Pot for our 11 year anniversary. Not sure what we are doing before that. I have a list of errands I would like to run, but I'm not sure if get to any of that.

Wow, I haven't written in a while...

Sun, 08 Mar 2009 05:20:13 GMT

This week has flown by. We have been so freaking busy and/or exhausted.

Last Sunday the family threw us a baby shower. It was really really nice. There were more people there than I expected. There were a lot more decorations and food too! The mom's went with a safari theme to match our nursery. There two fabulous diaper cakes. I don't want to take them apart! They are really cool. There were little safari toys everywhere.   Everything was Jackie friendly - chex mix, nuts, and jelly beans as snacks. The salad was all separated out with no dressing. There was even a giant plate of pineapple which is my favorite. I inhaled at least half of it. So much so that I burned my mouth. It was worth it though. They had Roundtable pizza brought in and Costco cupcakes :)

As soon as we arrived, we were berated for bringing the Toyota instead of the Forester. It was funny because Barry said he had already made two trips - in his Explorer. I laughed. Brandon asked his engineer dad how he thought two loads in an Explorer would fit in just my Forester. My Dad teased us about the car too. Seriously. They know I don't drive unless I have to so why would they think we would bring my car? Yes Brandon could drive it, but he likes his own car.

We barely got inside the house when we were ushered into the living room to the chair of honor to immediately start opening the mountain of gifts.   That was the most uncomfortable part for both of us - physically and emotionally for me. It hurts for me to sit especially when I was having to lean forward to open gifts. My rib was hurting so bad. I was so happy when the pizza got there because it meant I got a break. There were so many gifts! Brandon and I switched positions after pizza. That made it a little easier on me. Brandon and I both hate being in the spotlight like that. We would prefer to just party and mingle rather than open gifts in front of everyone. At least there were no games.

We really received some nice things. We got a HD video camera, the other car seat, the exersaucer, play gym, and more. I think my favorite gift was the homemade stuff Sandi made. She made us blankets, burp clothes, and hats. The patterns she chose were awesome - there were trains, dogs, and seahawks. The baby already has a brakeman's hat :) We are all set for football season too - we just need our dang season tickets! We also got the Octodog, the farting dog, and tons of clothes. My mom bought us a whole pile of stuff. She had a whole bag of breastfeeding accessories - which I was NOT going to hold up for the camera. I didn't want to open them in front of everyone.

Once the gifts were done, everyone had cupcakes. Those cupcakes are the best. I love them. By that time I was absolutely exhausted. As soon as everyone left, I had to go lay down. My back and rib was killing me. I needed a little nap to recover. Brandon and Barry took everything back to our house while I rested.   After he picked me up, we basically went home and crashed.

I spent the next two days writing and sending thank you cards. I wanted to make sure I had those done before the baby was born otherwise I might never get to them. I sent out over 40 of them. That was a lot of work. I am all ready to go for birth announcements too. I have address labels already printed. I think we need another book of stamps. I hadn't expected to send out so many thank you cards.

Baby Shower today!

Mon, 02 Mar 2009 07:00:10 GMT

I will write more on this later. I am so tired I can barely type. The Baby Shower was really nice today. Brandon and I loved it. About half way through I thought I was going to die from pain in my rib and back. I made it though.

Time for bed. I have a long busy week ahead of me.

Our kid will be ridin' in style

Sun, 01 Mar 2009 07:45:03 GMT

Today was a pretty lazy day at first. I didn't sleep very well at all, surprise surprise. Brandon got up early and went to the lab to have blood work done as a follow-up to the physical he had on Friday. When he got home at 9, I had barely moved. I got up and we had some breakfast. Right after that I could hardly keep my eyes open. I crashed on the couch for another hour and a half. When I woke-up, Dottie was asleep at my feet as usual :) Gotta love that dog. Brandon then took her for a long walk around the neighborhood. I tried my hardest to get going. I did manage to catalog and pack-up a bunch of stuff for Goodwill.

When Brandon got back from his walk with Dottie, he wanted to crash for a while. We each spent some time resting in bed and working on the computer. We decided that we wanted to go out to dinner. At first we were thinking Melting Pot. I wanted Brandon to sell the rest of the extra CDs at Silver Platters in Bellevue. Neither of us like the Bellevue Melting Pot very much. Gayle had just sent me a $10 off coupon for Maggianos so we decided to go there instead.

We had only had breakfast so we made the reservation really early - 4:45. We dropped the CDs off at Silver Platters and headed into Bellevue. We actually arrived at the restaurant at 4:25. It was no problem. The place was empty which meant we got awesome service! I loved it. It was really quiet in there too. Brandon and I both ate too much. I don't think I actually ate very much at all, but since there is no more room in there anymore I felt like I was going to burst. We went back to Silver Platters so Brandon could collect his cash.

We decided to go to REI and buy the kid carrier for hiking. We have been saving up our commuter dollars for months so we could buy it. Sadly the Issaquah REI didn't have it :( We didn't want to buy it online without trying it out first plus you can't use the commuter dollars online. An associate checked for us and said Seattle had 6 of them. We decided to go on over there. I'm glad we did. The Seattle store has all the carriers out with a weighted teddy bear there for you to use as a kid. Since Brandon will be the one carrying the kid, he tried them all out. We decided on the Deuter Kid Comfort III. It is really nice. It has all the adjusters our backpacking packs has. It also has a built-in, easy to install sunshade, hydration pouch, a ton of storage, and even a little toy bear. It was almost a pound lighter than the other carriers. Brandon liked all the pouches for storing stuff too. It was the only one with a chin guard for the kid too. It is definitely a cadillac.

The best part was we ended up only paying $20 for it! The carrier was $279 plus tax. We had our 20% off dividend coupon plus $220 in commuter dollars. Not bad at all! I still have my dividend to spend later. Brandon said the one we bought was much more comfortable for him too. Since he could be carrying up to 50lbs in that thing, comfort matters. We had been saving those commuter bucks forever. We had a huge stack of them. We had never used them before so I was hoping we didn't have to sign them all or that REI had to do something with each of them. Utlimately they treat them as a check and only scan one of them.

On the way back home, we decided to stop and get a few things at Target too. I almost went into their snack shack to see if the soft pretzels were ready :) I was exhausted at that point. I was going to turn into a pumpkin at any moment. All in all it was pretty fun day.

Last night I had my hair cut and colored and then went and got a pedi. I feel a little better about myself. I wanted my hair to look nice for the shower on Sunday.

It is time for bed now. I am hoping I get a miracle 8 hours tonight.

My baby's gonna be burninating the countryside

Thu, 26 Feb 2009 14:49:50 GMT

Yesterday my friends at work threw me a really nice baby shower. It was pretty much a non-baby baby shower which is exactly what I wanted. There were some decorations which said it was a baby shower, but there were no stupid games or cucumber finger sandwiches. There was no measuring the belly with string or a prize for the person who said 'cute' the most times. I loved it! Miss Lilturtle did a great job planning the whole thing. She said she was the worst choice for planning a baby shower because she doesn't like babies, but I think she was the best choice especially because she doesn't like babies. RJ was there and putting pressure on her to keep track of who gave what. I thought it was funny because I totally wouldn't have thought of taking notes at the time of opening gifts either. I missed that chapter in the girl handbook too.

The pizza and Costco cupcakes were fabulous. I was late so when I got there I already had a plate of pizza waiting for me. Brandon was already there too. I am glad he could come up for lunch. I should have made him sit in the middle of the room and open presents with me. He would have hated it as much as I did. I am really self conscience so sitting in the center of room with everyone watching wasn't really my cup of tea, but I survived. People were really generous. Wow. I couldn't believe all of the stuff. Brandon couldn't either. It took several trips to get it all upstairs. That doesn't even include several gift cards.

I was so excited about the Trogdor (http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail58.html) and Poopsmith (http://www.homestarrunner.com/vcr_poop.html) onesies! I guess I told JJ several years ago that I wanted those when I had a baby. Well he remembered! Too funny. The Trogdor onesie has a baby-faced Trogdor on it. Of course the Poopsmith has well, poop all over him. Total awesomeness. I can't wait to put the kid in them.

I want my independence back

Mon, 23 Feb 2009 03:49:10 GMT

I am so tired of being tired and in pain. I would give anything to sleep for 8 hours straight. My back is a mess. I really hope it goes back to normal after the baby is born. Hopefully my poor rib will heal too.   It is really tender. Brandon has been doing everything around here. I can't do anything that requires bending or lifting which isn't a lot. I can clean counters and mirrors. Driving is painful too so I don't drive unless I have to.

This weekend was pretty relaxed. Friday afternoon we took Dottie to Lake Wilderness for a nice long walk. The weather was fabulous so we wanted to get out in it.   We ate at Chicago Willys for dinner. The food is better than Red Robin, and it is cheaper too. Saturday I was in a funk. I was having a bit of an anxiety attack. To get me out of that, Brandon decided we should get out in the sun. We took Dottie to Rattlesnake Lake Recreation Area. We didn't go up to the ledge for obvious reasons. Dottie liked sniffing around the lake. After that we headed over to the Black Diamond Bakery for some cookies and pie.

I slept horribly last night. I woke-up in horrible pain about 4am. My back was killing me.  No matter which position I tried nothing helped. I needed some time this morning to recover from that. Brandon wanted to work on his music archive too. We didn't get out of the house until about 2. I needed to go to Target and the Gap. We decided to go to Redmond Town Center since it was close to Marymoor Park. Plus Dottie can walk around the mall too. I really hate that Brandon has to drive me on all of my errands. I can't wait until I can do them myself again. He will be happier too :) Target was pretty fast. Dottie liked walking around Redmond Town Center. There was a lot to sniff. We got her a treat at Eastside Dog too. She liked that a lot.

She did better at Marymoor than we thought she would. It doesn't have the small dog area so there was the potential for big dog run-ins. She actually ran and played a little with a beagle. She did okay with a few other dogs too. She was a bit overwhelmed by two goldens that ran right up to her at full speed. I think she got scared. She really wanted Brandon to hold her :) It was funny. There were two super cute little puppies that came up to her. One of them was panting really hard when it tried to sniff Dottie's rear. Dottie got a little tonge back there that she wasn't all that in to :) We didn't stay there very long. Dottie chased her ball all around until she wouldn't run anymore. Plus it started to rain so we decided to head home. Dottie slept most of the way too.

Why the economy sucks: Poor internal processes

Sat, 21 Feb 2009 00:47:22 GMT

Well not really, but I think a lot of companies would be doing a lot better if they would get their sh!t together! The saga of the $400 massages continues. I have called a few times to see how my claim is going. For two weeks it has been stuck in the medical coding department. Today when I called I was told it came back from coding and was coded properly as 'Medical Massage - back problem.' So I guess the $400 charge was correct. This baffles me because they are saying seeing a LMP costs MORE than seeing my board certified OB/GYN. Someone who went to MEDICAL school and is actually a real live doctor. Hmmmm. The good news is that is not the end of the story. The lady in the billing department is still working the claim because there is no way I should be charged $400 for a massage I was told was $80 especially when it is on their website! I have a screenshot of it just in case they change it. She said as soon as it is resolved she will be calling me personally which is great. Their internal processes are f'd up, but at least they acknowledge that. Funny thing is I got the bill for my portion today. I will be calling back to make sure they don't think this is overdue.

Yesterday I went to Target at lunch to pick-up some clearance Valentine's candy and thank you cards. I love the big salted pretzels their snack shack has. The past few times I have been to that Target at lunch time between 12-1 I have tried to order a pretzel and was told they weren't ready and wouldn't be for a while. Sigh. Yesterday was no different. Lucky for me there was a manager doing inventory right there. I told him about my recent experiences and what I thought about lunch foods not being ready at lunch! Honestly. It's like McDonalds saying their fries won't be ready for 30 minutes. I asked him what the pretzel sales have looked like lately. I bet they aren't good. Unfortunately I was hangry at that point and had no hope of getting anything else before my 1pm meeting. Luckily I found a bag of Sun Chips at my desk.

Happy Valentine's Day

Sun, 15 Feb 2009 08:27:15 GMT

For a couple that normally skips or does very little for Valentine's Day, we really did a lot this year. The funny thing is we both said we weren't going to buy each other presents. Last weekend Brandon mentioned something about wishing his iPod held more music. I can't remember exactly what he said, but he did say he was going to see what kind of deal he could get through work at Christmas time (they always offer deals on Apple stuff at X-mas). This was saying a lot for someone who NEVER wants anything. He will go until his pants are ripped and falling apart before saying he needs new ones. The only thing he ever really buys himself is music which isn't all that often.

Now I pretty much think the whole premise of Valentine's Day is ridiculous. It is a made-up holiday for candy and card makers. That being said I knew we were going to go out for cupcakes and probably dinner so I wanted to give him the iPod then. I was going to order it Monday, but for some reason I got distracted and forgot. I got it ordered Tuesday just in time for the shipping deadline. I wanted at the house by Thursday because I didn't want to give Brandon an empty iPod. I wanted to load the iPod with all the music he had archived last fall. A project that took 2 months. I started importing it into iTunes, and it was going sooooo slow. My library is on my external drive and the music was on DVDs so there was some latency there. I had 60 gigs to copy too. I was working on it all Thursday night. Brandon thought I was just nesting and doing one of my crazy projects :) He had no idea at all.

Friday I couldn't wait for him to leave for work so I could continue the copying. I thought I had enough time to copy all the music and sync the iPod. Sadly I got stuck at the car dealership and then stuck in traffic so my quick trip for an oil change turned into 3 hours :( When I got home I finished the music copy. When I went to sync iPod, I had to upgrade to a new version of iTunes. Damn! Brandon got home from work at that point. I was trying to hide what I was doing from him. I looked for every excuse I could to get him out of the office :) Finally I was able to start the syync. We were going out to dinner with his parents so the iPod could sync while we gone. When we got home, I shot upstairs to get the iPod out of the office and hidden so Brandon wouldn't see it.

The funny thing about all of this is Brandon also had secret plans. He needed me out of the office too so he could check on something as well. It was hilarious because I was afraid he would see the iPod cord going into my desk drawer and see what was going on. He was actually printing something off to surprise me with later.

Fast forward to today. We are getting ready to go out to the cupcake place and then to eat at the XXX Drive-in. Brandon had snuck a gift card to Gene Juarez into my purse. It was for a wonderful hot oil massage and pedicure which sounds soooo nice right now. I can't wait to go. I think I am going to save it until after the baby is born. That will be a nice retreat for me a month or so after delivery. I was so thrilled with it.

Once we were in the car, I was trying to think of a reason to get Brandon out of the car so I could switch his iPod with the new one. I didn't want to just give it him. I wanted it to be a surprise. Then I remembered the XXX only takes cash. Perfect! He went into QFC to get cash and a soda. Unfortunately the album he had playing from the old iPod was a cd he bought last week so it wasn't in the huge archive yet. I put on something I didn't think he would want to listen to so he would change it. He didn't even blink. Next I got out to go see if Mud Bay had Dottie's shampoo. While I was in the store I figured Brandon would mess with the iPod. Instead he checked the score of the Husky game. Damn! It was really starting to get funny now. We listen to Hail to the Thief all the way to the cupcake place in Renton.

Finally when we get back into the car, Brandon goes to plug the charger into the iPod and realizes that isn't his iPod. It was great too because Brandon's first thought was that someone had stolen his other iPod and replaced it with this one :) His iPod normally doesn't have the case on it because the FM transmitted won't connect with it on. I found a new case for the new iPod that would allow him to leave the case on and still use the transmitter. That's what tipped him off initially. Finally he looked at the back and saw it was the 120gb iPod. He was absolutely stunned. It was just the reaction I was hoping for. He was almost giddy too when he realized I had loaded the entire archive too. That made me sooo happy. He really deserved something nice for everything he has been doing for me. He does absolutely everything around here. I have never heard him complain once.

We still have a ways to go on creating the Complete Brandon and Jackie Music Library though. I had a lot of music on my laptop that wasn't part of the archive. Brandon has a bunch on his laptop too. Once we get both those libraries added we will copy the entire library over to the new 1TB drive I bought to hook into Brandon's desktop. We have 2 small drives that are full already. We really needed more space. Now we have two 1TB drives we can mirror for added data protection :) We may work on that tomorrow.

We were out for a really long time today. We went to the cupcake place, Bellevue Square (Sephora), Babies R Us, XXX drive in, Fairwood Pets, my Dad's house (to drop-off some cupcakes) and finally to Kohls. We were both really tired! I am hoping the weather is nice so we can take Dottie to Lake WIlderness for a walk. I may go to Costco too. We'll see.

This was definitely a great Valentine's Day. I am so glad Brandon liked the iPod. I can't wait to pamper myself at Gene Juarez too! I think everyone should go to the XXX for Valentine's Day. It was awesome. I love their food! Brandon definitely knows what I like. No fancy places for me ;)

Sigh...

Fri, 13 Feb 2009 06:10:07 GMT

Fun times. Drinking a ton of water today didn't help at all. My back was killing me by 10:00AM. I called the Dr to see if the radiology report had come back. It said my right kidney is definitely enlarged along with the right ureter (tube from kidney to bladder). No kidney stones were visible, but that doesn't mean there isn't one in the ureter. In order to see everything they need to get a CT, but they can't since I am pregnant. The report also said the enlargment is probably just from the pregnancy and not a blockage. That is comforting, but the pain is intense.

My Dr still hadn't seen the report yet so I had to wait for a call back. I finally got it about 4:00. We have two options - we could try to manage the pain with Tylenol and Vicodin or I could go into the hospital. The latter sounds awful. I would be admitted to the Birth Center. They would put me on a monitor and pain med drip. Then they would have a urologist put in a stent to open the ureter. All of this means I have to have a catheter and stay in the hospital until the kidney is back to normal. I definitely don't want to do that. I want to save my leave for when the baby is actually here.

So the plan now is to manage the pain as best we can. I go to the Dr every week now so he can monitor me. Basically we won't go with the hospital option unless the kidney becomes completely blocked. Apparently I will know if that happens because I will be in so much pain I will probably throw-up. Fun times! I keep thinking if we were meant to reproduce it would have been made a little easier. My friend V at work was so funny today. She said she's not going to have a baby until they can beam them out like on Star Trek. I think we should have gone that route too.

I am going to see how little vicodin I can take and still get some pain relief.

Just water please

Thu, 12 Feb 2009 06:47:08 GMT

I went to the Dr today. I was telling him how he had to do something for this backpain. He examined my back further and pressed in certain spots one that hurt really bad. At that point he said the problem could be with my right kidney. We no wonder massage, Tylenol, heating pads, etc weren't working! Jeez. He ordered a renal ultrasound to be done ASAP. I went in for that this afternoon. Of course they had me drink a ton of water so they could press on my painfully full bladder. They looked at both kidneys and saw no stones which is good. Then they watched my kidneys empty into my bladder which is actually kind of cool. I like medical technology. Anyway the left kidney was emptying fabulously. The right one on the other hand not so much. Obviously a very full kidney can cause some pain. I guess this is common in pregnancy especially on the right side just like me!

I have to wait for a call from my doctor tomorrow, but I did look-up my symptoms on the internets. One thing I know I am really bad at is staying hydrated. That can cause this problem. I can't have my juice or caffinated drinks anymore. I didn't drink that many, but I had them on occasion when I was fading fast at work. Anyway, I drank an entire liter of water in about an hour and guess what? The throbbing in my back subsided for the first time in weeks. It didn't totally go away, but it became bearable. Tomorrow I will focus on drinking tons of water and see if that helps. Without the pain tonight I actually had energy! If I could get rid of the throbbing pain, I think the next 6 weeks might be okay.